Difference between revisions of "Nia Kelly"

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Nia Kelly is a Ghost, Cryptid, Scammer, or all of the above, that has been terrorizing the Knox College mailroom since October 2018. Dozens of packages, of all shapes, sizes, and weights, have arrived for Nia Kelly, mostly from Amazon. No "Nia Kelly" has ever been a student, staff, or faculty member of Knox College since its founding in 1837. If you have information on the whereabouts of Nia Kelly, please contact Sherrill Zaric at szaric@knox.edu, assuming Nia has not already injured, trapped, or otherwise incapacitated you. Techniques from reputable sources, such as "finding bigfoot" and "ghost adventures", have so far yielded no concrete evidence of Nia Kelly's existence.  
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Nia Kelly is a Ghost, Cryptid, Scammer, or all of the above, that has been terrorizing the Knox College mailroom since October 2018. Dozens of packages, of all shapes, sizes, and weights, have arrived for Nia Kelly, mostly from Amazon™. No "Nia Kelly" has ever been a student, staff, or faculty member of Knox College since its founding in 1837. If you have information on the whereabouts of Nia Kelly, please contact Sherrill Zaric at szaric@knox.edu, assuming Nia has not already injured, trapped, or otherwise incapacitated you. Techniques from reputable sources, such as "finding bigfoot" and "ghost adventures", have so far yielded no concrete evidence of Nia Kelly's existence.  
  
There are a number of theories surrounding the mysterious Nia Kelly:
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'''There are a number of theories surrounding the mysterious Nia Kelly:'''
  
 
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== asd ==  
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== Amazon-Zaric Cartel ==  
 
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'''
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One of the most plausible theories regarding the mystery of Nia Kelly is that Nia Kelly does not, in fact, exist, and is instead a front for amazon™ to ship illicit goods to their chief Northeastern Illinois Distributor, likely Sherrill Zaric or a higher up in the Knox College administration.
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'''
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== Ghost Shopper ==
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'''
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Another, more popular theory, is that Nia Kelly is in fact a ghost of a 19th century widow from the Galesburg Area with unfinished business or who died under malicious circumstances. Upon discovering an ability to use or manipulate the internet, Nia Kelly became infatuated with the incredibly futuristic idea of ordering anything online with amazon™

Revision as of 10:02, 17 June 2019

Nia Kelly is a Ghost, Cryptid, Scammer, or all of the above, that has been terrorizing the Knox College mailroom since October 2018. Dozens of packages, of all shapes, sizes, and weights, have arrived for Nia Kelly, mostly from Amazon™. No "Nia Kelly" has ever been a student, staff, or faculty member of Knox College since its founding in 1837. If you have information on the whereabouts of Nia Kelly, please contact Sherrill Zaric at szaric@knox.edu, assuming Nia has not already injured, trapped, or otherwise incapacitated you. Techniques from reputable sources, such as "finding bigfoot" and "ghost adventures", have so far yielded no concrete evidence of Nia Kelly's existence.

There are a number of theories surrounding the mysterious Nia Kelly:

Amazon-Zaric Cartel

One of the most plausible theories regarding the mystery of Nia Kelly is that Nia Kelly does not, in fact, exist, and is instead a front for amazon™ to ship illicit goods to their chief Northeastern Illinois Distributor, likely Sherrill Zaric or a higher up in the Knox College administration.

Ghost Shopper

Another, more popular theory, is that Nia Kelly is in fact a ghost of a 19th century widow from the Galesburg Area with unfinished business or who died under malicious circumstances. Upon discovering an ability to use or manipulate the internet, Nia Kelly became infatuated with the incredibly futuristic idea of ordering anything online with amazon™