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| | 4. Never forget the Raubelisk; take back the pilgrim! | | 4. Never forget the Raubelisk; take back the pilgrim! |
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| − | (Read verbatim from the back of a flattened Newports box)
| + | The giant banana is going to be sliced up and made into a costume. Deal with it. |
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| − | In short: one for the money, two for the motherfuckin haters keep my name in the game, screamin FUCK THE WORLD!
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| − | === The Raubstitution of Windependence ===
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| − | The 2010-2011 residents of Raub 1 wrote and ratified this document as the official mission statement of Raub 1. | |
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| − | Wu the People of the suite of Raub, in Order to form the most excellent Union, establish Bossness, insure domestic Mellowness, provide for the Common Room Defense, promote the General Ruckus, and secure the blessings of TRGBIS to ourselves and our Livers, do ordain and establish this Raubstitution of Windependence of the Wunited Suites of Raub.
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| − | === Religious Views ===
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| − | In the beginning, there was the Raubalisk and on the fourth day of September 2010 it hath shined its eternal glory upon the suite of Raub 1 in addition to some very special Sellewians. Our Diety hath used its great powers of majesty to draw the forces of the Universe into the very vicinity of the Suite of Raub, tuning the residents into majestic beasts, servants of the great Raubalisk. They were called Raubalites: The Boss, RedBear, The Maat-J, The J-Bones, The Squillhelm, ProspArgh, and Ka'lil the Unreal.
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| − | Soon after this mysterious transformation, the residents were drawn to an unassuming rummage sale. It was at this sale where they acquired the mystical idol. Using its heavenly magnetism, the Great Raubalisk drew itself into the lives of the Raubalites. For much of fall term these great beasts lived in harmony in the Suites of Raub, where they frolicked merrily. The Raubalisk taught its servants the Mysteries of Chessboxin' and Shaolin Shadowboxing, once perfected by the great ODB, and the Way of TRGBIS. Although their rituals are shrouded by a strict code of secrecy, we are told that the mysterious Raubalites worshiped the Great One every day, a little after 4PM. They could also be seen occupying the Foxhole Temple late at night, observing the moon.
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| − | For the duration of the term these young disciples trained with their Master, learning the Majesty of the Knox College Campus. Until one day, a great evil entered into the hallowed walls of Raub. Some say it snuck in through Sellew, some say it came from above, some say it was the devil itself coming up from the depths of hell. Regardless of what the force was, it broke the 9 Seals of the 36th Chamber and stole away with The Great One, leaving a ransom note for the Resident Beasts of Majesty.
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| − | The world may never know what truly happened to the Raubalisk but its power remains in Raub in the hearts of the Resident Beasts of Majesty. Today, the search continues...
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| − | [[Category:Housing]]
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Revision as of 23:26, 21 February 2011
Raub-Sellew is home to the infamous Sellew 1, whose prospective student party has gotten them banned from hosting prospectives, and Raub 3, the female outpost of Seymour 2. Located in the exact center of the quads, they suffer from massive fire drills, Flunk Day scares, water wars, mud pits, and general awesomeness coming at them from all sides.
The real downside to living in Raub-Sellew? The showers. Unfortunately, while there are three of them, the showers are lined up in such a way that, in order to enter or exit, one must walk directly through someone else's three feet of cleansing space. In the mornings, there can often be heard shouts of "I'm coming in!" or "Which shower are you in?". Hygiene becomes an issue, as the only way to cover up when you're being invaded is to wrap yourself in one of the slimy, moldy curtains. Said curtains are reported to have seen the Grand Opening of Raub-Sellew; however, they could not be reached for questioning.
Raub 0 was the home to a group of Cave trolls during the 2009-2010 year. All beware those who ventured into this dungeon.
Raub1 was also the home of sumo, water balloons, movie parties, water guns, nerf guns and more. All who approach beware.
2010-2011
The 2010-2011 inhabitants of Raub 1 came up with the first ever recorded code of conduct for the Raub-Sellew suites. They are called The Raub Commandments and read as thus follows:
1. Don't f*ck the fat chick
2. Raub's the sh*t
3. Tolerance is dark
4. Never forget the Raubelisk; take back the pilgrim!
The giant banana is going to be sliced up and made into a costume. Deal with it.
