Chris Johnson
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The Basics
Crazy on Guitar Hero. He will laugh maniacally at your steaming corpse after burning it down with his sheer awesomeness.
Well, probably not. But you get the idea.
He also goes by a number of aliases. Most know him as Mittens, but a few reliable sources have been overheard calling him by various and sundry initials that all seem to terminate in "MF". SWAMF and CMF are among them.
Chris is better than you
After finishing his Honors Project during the 2010-2011 school year, Chris went on to the MIT PhD program. Knox campus cried both out of missing Chris and incredible jealousy.