California

California is governed by the Terminator (Arnold Schwartzeneger). He is surprisingly democratic despite his portrayal in the movies Terminator and Terminator II.

California's GDP is larger than most countries, and if it was to ever secede from the Union, America's economy would collapse instantaneously.

Famous Northern Californians

Emperor Norton John Muir William Randolph Hearst George Lucas

Famous Southern Californians

Tom Cruise Juan Junipero Serra Donald Rogers

California Transplants

These are people who were not born in California but instead move there and try to pass themselves off as natives. They are easily spotted by their weird hemp jewelry, Ugg boots in winter, and use of the term "Cali". Transplants lack wry Californian wit evident in true natives, who mock them in hushed tones.

Common Misconceptions

Everyone who lives in California is super wealthy. Californians have never seen snow (however, many Californians believe that 56 degrees Fahrenheit is "cold").

Californian Oppression

California Barbie says: "I think people hate us because they are jealous and don't have enough money to move to California and be us!"