Editing 2009 Flunk Day Safety Email

The following is timestamped April 29, 2009 2:14 PM.  It is the safety email preceding [[Flunk Day 2009]].

[From Dean Romano]

Hello Kiddies!

The time has come for our annual tradition of Flunk Day myths, facts, and, of course, community expectations. This is the "official" e-mail that governs and sets the tone (aka "rules") for el Dia de Flunk.

But first, kudos are in order to the Wiki Fire which many of you have recommended I read. So I did...last night. Wow! =-O ! Not quite sure how to respond to the Wiki Fire...2 feet, 4 feet, a haze of smoke in Old Main (now that is clearly not true!). And quite the fascination with someone named "Pam." Because of all of this stress, Pam has left campus and gone to "the city"--New York ~ not Peoria. Well done Wiki people...now you have scared off Pam and she will be forever lost among the really "big" buildings. You should feel ashamed.

Ok...time to pay attention. I'm serious here...really. Oh, before I forget, did you know that (and this is really true--really) Pennsylvania's Arlen Specter changed political parties on Tuesday because of Knox alum Brad Middleton '08, who is the "power" behind Illinois Senator Durbin in DC? Well done, Brad! We are proud of you--well, most of us ;-) .

Sorry...back to "myths" and "facts."

    * Fact: Today was not Flunk Day.
    * Myth: The grass on campus is never cut on Sundays.
    * Fact: There are food service deliveries on Sunday evenings during Spring Term.
    * Myth: Seniors always know when Flunk Day takes place.
    * Fact: The prairie plot located by the tennis courts is Knox's version of Stephen King's Pet Sematary.
    * Myth: Varsity athletic teams practice during Flunk Day. Can you say D-A-N-G-E-R-O-U-S??!!
    * Fact: Flunk Day is at the top of alumni's cherished memories.
    * Myth: The mud pit is cool!
    * Fact: The mud pit is totally nasty and is not a part of el Dia de Flunk--why would we sanction something that is this totally gross, dangerous, and creates physical ailments?
    * Myth: Flunk Day can never take place on a Monday or Friday...or can it?
    * Fact: Flunk Day is a community event for all members of the Knox community--meaning students, faculty, staff, and their families.
    * Myth: Flunk Day and Cinco de Mayo are not one in the same...get a clue!
    * Fact: The faculty softball team always dominates the seniors; does anyone care?
    * Myth: The Villa is not Flunk Day Central (well, sorta myth...we will have to wait and see).
    * Fact: Andrew Polk wants--according to Facebook post--to be mentioned in relationship to el Dia de Flunk (how does it feel?).
    * Myth: Knox faculty love Flunk Day. Well, not really...takes away from scheduled teaching, exams, and other fun activities. A concern that Flunk Day takes away from the College's academic focus. Sure. Believe what you want!
    * Fact: Campus Safety officers are really cool people. 'Tis true. They are our friends and are here to ensure all of our safety (Note: Not cool to run away from them on Flunk Day ~ can cause coronary...for someone).
    * Myth: Craig Southern loves Flunk Day...'nuf said!
    * Fact: The best of the Knox community should be evident on Flunk Day--absolutely!!!

I am reminded once again how truly amazing, unique, and special this College on the Prairie is. While these traditions have largely passed on in collegiate America, Flunk Day works and continues because of each one of you. Have a truly special and wonderful day.

Flunk on!
-Xavier (aka Dean of Flunk!)

Fact & Myth: A movement was started years ago on Flunk Day to change the Knox athletic team mascot from "Prairie Fire" to the "Knox Squirrels" or "Prairie Lobsters." The president then stifled the collection of petitions as "Prairie Lobsters" was a clear favorite--mascot potential endless. I say let's try again. Go Prairie Lobsters!