Neal 1
Requirements for Residency
In the interest of preventing a battle of the largest egos on campus the following information has been added for clarification of the bizarre space-time anomalies surrounding Neal 1.
Neal 1 is traditionally occupied by enormous egos. As a side effect of this requirement each incoming group of residents believes themselves to be enormously greater than the last. The phenomonen creates a duality of perspectives.
Since both groups have egos large enough to declare their opinions to be fact, the following contridiction arises:
- Each incoming group is certainly greater than the last by an order of magnitude.
- Each leaving group is certainly greater than the incoming group by an order of magnitude.
In Mathematics this is a contradiction, however due to the principles of quantum mechanics we find the two facts actually reside in quantum superposition — that is, both facts are simultaneously true and not true. Thus we can declare all of the following predicates as valid:
- The new residents of Neal 1 will certainly suck
- The new residents of Neal 1 will certainly show up the old residents
- The old residents of Neal 1 will certainly live on as the greatest of the Neal 1 residents
- The old residents of Neal 1 certainly sucked
2007 Residents
The residents of Neal 1 in 2007 were insane. They never did anything wrong. They were also the best looking suite on the entire campus.
Neal 1 helped to construct Flunk Day 2007's epic mud pit.
Residents:
2008 Residents
The future residents of Neal 1 in 2008 are an esoteric group of derelicts. They are part of a housing block of 24 which also appropriated Conger 1 for the 07-08 year. This group represents a majority of the 06-07 residents of Seymour 2 and their friends. Neal 1 has been designated the rowdier half of Seymour 2's housing block, which means a couple people will drink alcohol and play live music.
Residents:
Can the new residents of Neal (2007-2008) handle the awesome power of Neal? I don't think so.
