Difference between revisions of "Flunk Term 2020"

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Happy Flunk Week to everyone but mostly the person writing poetry and stuff in here, I really appreciate your work! <-- Thanks! And doubly thanks also for creating this page! It's a shame I'm not a writing major; I could've used this in my portfolio. Happy Flunk Week All!
 
Happy Flunk Week to everyone but mostly the person writing poetry and stuff in here, I really appreciate your work! <-- Thanks! And doubly thanks also for creating this page! It's a shame I'm not a writing major; I could've used this in my portfolio. Happy Flunk Week All!
 +
 +
[[Drake bell]] has advised us to day drink even if we have class.
 +
^Wow that was... surreal
  
 
==May 19, 2020 (Tue)==
 
==May 19, 2020 (Tue)==
Line 724: Line 727:
  
 
==May 21, 2020 (Thu)==
 
==May 21, 2020 (Thu)==
 +
              ''Flunk Week 2020 Scavenger Hunt Items''
 +
 +
  1. 🗅🔥🦊🔥🗅
 +
  2. 📘
 +
  3. 🧠
 +
  4. ☕
 +
  5. 📃
 +
  6. 📰
 +
  7. 🎹
 +
  8. 🦊
 +
  9. ⬜˜😬
 +
  10. ⛎8️⃣
 +
  11. 🚽🗞️🗑️
 +
  12. 🐱
 +
  13. 🚴‍♀️
 +
  14. ☆
 +
  15. 🐻
 +
  16. 📅
 +
  17. 🐚
 +
  18. 📖
 +
  19. 🏳️‍🌈
 +
  20. 🍌
  
 
==May 22, 2020 (Fri)==
 
==May 22, 2020 (Fri)==
 +
              ''Crossroads''
 +
 +
  Today we stand at a crossroad
 +
  Looking at the end of a week-long rendition
 +
  Of online performances contrary to tradition
 +
  We stand in the middle of an indoor epoch
 +
  Staring down the last line of the epode
 +
  Wondering where to go from here
 +
 
 +
  It is not too late to step on the brakes
 +
  Take a left turn at the next lane
 +
  While the sign says to go right ahead
 +
  This is our path to choose
 +
 
 +
  Who knows what the future bodes
 +
  The outcome is not predisposed
 +
  When the beginning is as chaotic
 +
  It gets easier to temper the fear
 +
  When we start with nothing to lose
 +
 
 +
  With feet unsteady, we face the teeth
 +
  Of time baring down on us
 +
  And we, what do we do?
 +
 
 +
  I, I face one way
 +
  You, you face another
 +
  And we step through the crossroads
  
 
==May 25, 2020 (Mon)==
 
==May 25, 2020 (Mon)==
 +
              ''Memorial Day : Year 2020''
 +
 +
    ___
 +
  (_ _)
 +
    | |
 +
    | |
 +
    | |
 +
    | |
 +
    | |
 +
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 +
    | |
 +
    | |
 +
    | |
 +
    | |
 +
    | |--- * * * * * * * * * * OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO|
 +
    | |  \ * * * * * * * * *  :::::::::::::::::::::::::|
 +
    | |    * * * * * * * * * * OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO|
 +
    | |    * * * * * * * * *  :::::::::::::::::::::::::|
 +
    | |    * * * * * * * * * * OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO|
 +
    | |    * * * * * * * * *  :::::::::::::::::::::::::|
 +
    | |    * * * * * * * * * * OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO|
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    | |    :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::|
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    | |    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO|
 +
    | |    :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::|
 +
    | |    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO|
 +
    | |  /:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::|
 +
    | |  / OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO|
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    | |-
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 +
    |_|
  
 
==May 26, 2020 (Tue)==
 
==May 26, 2020 (Tue)==
 +
              ''Last Day Of Classes Countdown: 3 days''
 +
 +
  Flunk Week may be over, but Flunk Term has always been with us.
 +
  Breathe in. Breathe out. I implore you to hold steady until the end.
  
 
==May 27, 2020 (Wed)==
 
==May 27, 2020 (Wed)==
 +
              ''Last Day Of Classes Countdown: 2 days''
 +
 +
  Congratulations on all that you've managed to accomplish
 +
  And for all the things you will accomplish later on.
  
 
==May 28, 2020 (Thu)==
 
==May 28, 2020 (Thu)==
 +
              ''Last Day Of Classes Countdown: 1 day''
 +
 +
  You made it! For most of you now, there's only one hurdle left,
 +
  So face forward, believe in yourself, and spring to the end!
  
 
==June 7, 2020 (Sun)==
 
==June 7, 2020 (Sun)==
  
 
Flunk instead of Commencement?? <-- In the Gizmogram's own words "a virtual celebration is being planned for June 7." And what better way is there to celebrate the Spring Term?
 
Flunk instead of Commencement?? <-- In the Gizmogram's own words "a virtual celebration is being planned for June 7." And what better way is there to celebrate the Spring Term?
 +
 +
              ''An Open Letter to the Class of 2020''
 +
 +
  Hey, everyone. Congrats! You made it. Know that I and many others are very proud of you, and we wish you happiness and safety wherever you may go. That's about all that I wanted to say. I know, it's a bit anticlimactic isn't it? Of course, just because something isn't exciting doesn't mean it's not worth celebrating and reflecting upon. 
 +
 
 +
  I'm not Maria Hinojosa, and this is not a commencement speech. Rather, this is just some friendly communication from me to you, to let you know that you are acknowledged, your journey is appreciated, and you are not alone. Plus, the fun thing about a letter versus a speech is that letters feel more intimate, and more encouraging of a reply. (Side note: did you know each page on the WikiFire has a discussion tab?) On the internet, there are so many platforms for discourse, so many ways you can learn and share in various ideas with people you might have never met otherwise. Off the internet, there exist public forums and other ways to make your voice heard. 
 +
 
 +
  Instead of the multiple speeches that you would have received today, have a discussion. Have multiple discussions. Stay connected with your friends and with your community. 
 +
 
 +
  I'd wager that most folks don't remember much about their graduation after a few years, at least not what was said or the details of what happened on that day. Although 2020 is a very memorable year that will no doubt go down in history, memory is still a fickle thing. And so, I encourage you to think about writing your own letter to yourself. Recount what you're doing today, how you feel, what you're thinking about, and what you want to tell your future self. 
 +
 
 +
  What I want to tell both present and future you is always keep your momentum going. Find time for your hobbies and avenues for laughter. Interact with people, make new acquaintances, civilly challenge their view of the world as well as your own. Never stop asking questions and never stop learning. And, of course, stay hydrated.
 +
 
 +
  Here are some of my favorite letter closings that I've been using these past few months:
 +
 
 +
  Well wishes,
 +
  Take care,
 +
  Cheers from afar,
 +
  Quarantinely,
 +
 
 +
  [[Special:Contributions/96.241.228.56|96.241.228.56]] 18:12, 6 June 2020 (PDT)
  
 
==Early August (???)==
 
==Early August (???)==
 
Flunk instead of Commencement...2? (Pritzker permitting, of course)
 
Flunk instead of Commencement...2? (Pritzker permitting, of course)
 +
 +
              ''An Open Letter to Tom Fucoloro''
 +
 +
  Hi Tfooq,
 +
 
 +
  You don't know me and I only know of you, but I just wanted to say (well, type), "Thank you." I, and no doubt many others, probably felt the vague pressure to somehow become the best versions of ourselves simply because pseudo-quarantine has given us more "free time." It was very easy to become disappointed with myself before falling asleep at night, realizing that I spent most of the day being as unproductive as always, laying in bed, watching Youtube videos, and playing video games. I guess it's questionable whether editing the WikiFire can be considered productive, but it did give me a goal and I had fun doing it. Besides, this WikiFire has given me a lot of joy over the years beyond just this page, so I want to thank you for being the progenitor of it all.
 +
 
 +
  Anyway, good luck with your career, stay safe and healthy, and keep on keeping on!
 +
 
 +
  All the best,
 +
  A fellow alum
 +
 
 +
  (Post-script: Thanks also to Sarahwall. Flunk Term is a brilliant name!)
  
 
[[Category: Flunk Day]]
 
[[Category: Flunk Day]]

Latest revision as of 17:12, 6 June 2020

The most cursed term of them all, Flunk Term 2020.

The hype, the hope, and the hurt, the facts and the phallices; will you be packing up your 6 foot bong? How much PBR do you need to stock up on? Or Corona? Have you spotted Teresa Amott without her human skin, wandering campus alone? Tell us about the unicorn that galloped through the quad while no one was there but you. Pick your e-girl outfit, fill your bottles with rum, grab a shovel and dig dig d i g

Join us. Hear the friars across the world. Join us with (virtual) pots and pans and heart and (virtual) hype.

Join us.


(don't forget to hydrate.)

Join in the fun?[edit]

Visit the How to edit the wikifire page for a quick rundown of the steps for how to edit this (and any other) page!

the more contributors we have, the more fun it gets! with the online term, we really need this, guys.

April 1, 2020 (Wed)[edit]

First day of Flunk Term. Maybe it's just an April Fools Joke? 

               A Visit from St. Flunk 

  'Twas the night before Flunk Term, when all through the lawn
  Not a creature was stirring, not at dusk nor at dawn;
  The stock market was crashing. The world was unsure
  How long this will last. How long must we endure?
  The students were nestled all snug in their beds,
  While visions of St. Flunk danced in their heads;
  And Blaze in their jersey, and Lincoln with his hat,
  Stood 6 feet apart and had a little chat.
  About squirrels, mud pits, all the memories they had
  Of the past and the present, both the good and the bad.
  They talked of SMC rats and of long nights at CFA,
  Of history, debates, and the Old Main stairway.
  And, oh, how it felt to be in college and be free
  To act in Playground and dance in Terpsichore.
  But nothing could compare to the joy of Spring term
  To that one special day only a few could confirm.
  That day better known for going wild and getting drunk
  Waking up at 6 am to the call of St. Flunk.
  With their merry band of friars and foxes in tow
  Their names oft forgotten, except one we all know:
  "We have our new mascot, their name is not Pride,
  Nor is it Ember, that choice was cast aside.
  On Blaze, dash forward, and entertain this court!
  Get the crowd to cheer for our team and for this sport!"
  And Lincoln, too, has an important sport to acclaim,
  The one on Post lawn, the Flunk Day softball game.
  And though for this year, that sport is not allowed
  Because of the fact that it draws in quite a crowd
  We can still connect while staying safe inside, 
  As long as we permit St. Flunk to be our guide.
  We can still enjoy our stash of liquor and booze.
  It's okay to take some time to scream and let loose.
  What once was a day has been extended a term long
  Where you won't be in trouble if you're caught with a bong.
  Don't get me wrong, you should still focus on your class,
  The irony in Flunk Term is to still try to pass.
  And yes, Seniors, it's true that you've been pretty screwed
  And Freshman, it makes sense, if you're feeling confused.
  But there's a lot we can learn from COVID-19,
  Besides a reminder of the tenants of hygiene. 
  It's taught us, though apart, we're all in this together,
  And though it's cliche, this is a storm we will weather.
  The squirrels will still cross the street without fear.
  We'll gather again to burn the prairie next year.
  Seniors, you may have thought this was your last season,
  But homecoming exists for this very reason.
  Hail to Alma Mater, after all this has passed,
  Come back again. Trust me, these cornfields will last,
  And the crows will defy the raven's nevermore
  Since 1837, they will cry "Evermore."
  Except maybe for pumphandle, that tradition can go
  Or we could all simply learn to greet with an elbow.
  Nevertheless just know this pandemic will end
  Keep in touch with your loved ones and be a good friend.
  St. Flunk's parting words while in quarantine as you wait:
  "Happy Flunk Term to all, and don't forget to hydrate!"

April 2, 2020 (Thu)[edit]

               I Dreamed A Dream - Spring Remix

  There was a time not long ago
  When we could go outside
  And sunbathe together
  There was a time when the radio
  Would give some news beyond 
  Waiting, feeling tethered
  There was a time
  
  Then it all went wrong
  
  I dreamed a dream of springs back then
  When grades weren't high, but I was living
  I dreamed of coming back again
  I dreamed that loans would be forgiving
  Then I was young and unafraid
  To try courses and drop them later
  There were no book fees to be paid
  If they were loaned, no feeling was greater
  
  But the virus came overseas
  With not much done to prevent it
  As it took your breath away
  As it turned your dream to shame
  It might just take our summer, too
  As hospitals are getting desperate
  To not treat this like some common flu
  Or we'd only have ourselves to blame
  And still I dream that we'll all see
  The good change that can come from this
  But there are dreams that cannot be
  When good ideas are being dismissed
  I had a dream spring term would be
  So different from what we're all living
  So different now from what it seemed
  Will COVID-19 kill the dream
  I dreamed?

April 3, 2020 (Fri)[edit]

               Flunk Term Acrositc - Abv.

  Fun-
  Loving
  Until
  Now
  Knowing
  
  This
  Epidemic
  Really
  Migrated

April 6, 2020 (Mon)[edit]

               Flunk Day Acrostic - Extended

  Friendships are made and broken at the starting
  Line of the Rat Race
  Under the waterfall of the Slip 'n Slide
  Next to the fried funnel cake vendor selling to drunks singing
  Karaoke in front of Seymour Union
  
  Do you remember wiping out? Twisting your
  Ankle after the third time on the Meltdown? That's not happening this
  Year

25 days to Flunk Day

April 7, 2020 (Tue)[edit]

               FY 2020 Q1

  ....................../´¯T 
  ....................o/¯..d 
  .................../a.../ 
  .............y´¯I'...'/s¯¯`·¸ 
  ........../a/..w/...a/......r/¯\ 
  ........(e(a..´...´.... ¯~/l...l) 
  .........\....y............b..../ 
  ..........i'...\g.........b_.·´ 
  ............\i.............r 
  ..............\..d..........\

24 days to Flunk Day

April 8, 2020 (Wed)[edit]

               Excerpt From The Students For Flunk Day Truth

  ο If you value your soul, STAY IN ON 
    FLUNK DAY!

23 days to Flunk Day

April 9, 2020 (Thu)[edit]

               An Indoor Limerick

  Sing the song of quarantine
  The likes of which we've never seen
  It stopped our day of play
  Forced us all to stay away
  And now we all learn through a screen.

22 days to Flunk Day

April 10, 2020 (Fri)[edit]

               Transformation

  Happens  between  - each 
   blink  -
  It's always an - -
        time to
   be        alive

21 days to Flunk Day

April 13, 2020 (Mon)[edit]

               You can't take tradition away from us

  You can't take tradition away from us
  Like history books, we'll choose what can stay
  You can't make a change without any fuss
  
  Since the future is so precarious
  Always, my child, you must follow my way
  You can't take tradition away from us
  
  Straying from the path is too dangerous
  For in the unknown you are easy prey
  You can't make a change without any fuss
  
  Creating something new is traitorous
  To our ancestors and our glory days
  You can't take tradition away from us
  
  Legacy sticks around for good purpose
  And fights endlessly against the decay
  You can't make a change without any fuss
  
  I will live on through means vicarious
  Carry me when I am lost to the gray
  You can't take tradition away from us
  You can't make a change without any fuss

20 days to Flunk Day

April 14, 2020 (Tue)[edit]

               Boxed In

  In  a  box,  I'm  a  slave  to  the  structure —
  Trapped,   unable   to   measure   my   wingspan.
  I    must   conform  to the   shape   of the box.
  In  a  box,  there   are   lines   and   vertices
  That strictly define my front, back, left, right.
  But     what    if   I  sat against  a    corner?
  In  a  box,  I   attempt  to   change   my  shape
  By trying to  touch all    six sides    at   once.
  I   start   to    wonder  what   else  I   can do.
  In  a  box,  I  start  to   think   this   is odd.
  How   am    I  so   sure   that    I      am even
  In a box?

19 days to Flunk Day

April 15, 2020 (Wed)[edit]

               When people say, "pics or it didn't happen," what they really mean is...

  [citation needed]

18 days to Flunk Day

April 16, 2020 (Thu)[edit]

               Lorem Ipsum

        Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur dipiscing elit,
       tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore ultrices. Porttitor
      morbi non arcu risus quis.   D   olor elit amet consectetur
     adipiscing sit. Urna est      u      m eu facilisis sed odio.
    Aliquam nunc eratvelit etia    m    libero tristique nectus sed
    fames ac. Placerat vestibulum     lectus mauris ultrices congue
    nibh venenatis cras sed feli   s   eget velit. Sed enim viverra
   sit. Tortor consequat id        p        orta nibh venenatis cras
   neque laoreet suspend           i           sse. Neque incididunt
  nil faucibus libero. Mau         r         is venenatis suspendisse
   vitae. Aliquam etiam erat dol   o   re urna scelerisque in dictum
   pretium aenean pharetra magna ac placerat vestibulum. Tortor nunc
    cursus metus elit vulputate mi s risus amet mauris. Mattis quis
    sit amet nil in mollis nunc    p    urus sed id. Mi egestas sed
    nunc vel risus morbi, viv      e      rra. Lectus ultrices eros
     nisl felis mattis rhoncus u   r   na neque viverra. Tempus et
      in malesuada pellentesque p  o  rta elit gravida cum. Dolor
       enim nulla aliquet porttitor lacus. Vel magna scelerisque
        pulvinar suspendisse libero tristique morbi vestibulum.

17 days to Flunk Day

April 17, 2020 (Fri)[edit]

               On Mobile

  What      new                             fresh 
                  h                                  e                                 l
                    l                                  is 
  this, 
              t                              h                              a                              t 
  has caused 
  my reality to                          s                                        h                                   i    
         f
   t
        ?
  
     And yet,                                     somehow, 
  sometimes, 
      i                                      t 
  makes 
  things                                    easier
  
  to see the world 
  and it's people
                                            from a distance                           further 
  than 
                                                                                                            6 
  
  
  
  feet

16 days to Flunk Day

April 20, 2020 (Mon)[edit]

               Blaze It

  A day that's a cause for concern
  That we can all readily confirm
  It's not Flunk Day, but you know
  We're all stressed right now, so
  Go ahead and celebrate Flunk Term.

15 days to Flunk Day

April 21, 2020 (Tue)[edit]

               Coming Out

  It only takes four tildes

14 days to Flunk Day

April 22, 2020 (Wed)[edit]

               Flunk Term Theme Suggestions Pt. 1

  Cyberflunk 2020! ◘-◘

13 days to Flunk Day

April 23, 2020 (Thu)[edit]

               Flunk Term Theme Suggestions Pt. 2

  Guardians of the Flunk 😷

12 days to Flunk Day

Senate GA notes finally reveal: Virtual Flunk Day will be happening, confirmed! <-- Double-confirmed! The news of Virtual Flunk is on the Gizmogram.

April 24, 2020 (Fri)[edit]

               Flunk Term Theme Suggestions Pt. 3

  Flunktagion 🦠

11 days to Flunk Day

April 27, 2020 (Mon)[edit]

               Starvation

  Laying in bed, too unmotivated to cook
  Lining up at a food bank, two miles long
  Looking at a drive-thru, wondering if it's worth it
  
  Life for a life for a life, we carry on

[2:30 PM] A direct quote from the Knox College Gizmogram: "Did You Know... Even though they're not on campus right now, students are working to keep the Flunk Day tradition alive! This year's Union Board is planning remote Flunk Day events that will connect and uplift current Knox students. As you can imagine, this is challenging for them on many personal and logistical levels. If you would like to support or collaborate with them, let us know!

Contact Becky Canfield"

10 days to Flunk Day

April 28, 2020 (Tue)[edit]

               Trepidation

  On the precipice of finding motivation
     A heart that matches
  Only to find another excuse, justified
     My scattered thoughts
  Or not, the guilt remains
     And drumming fingertips

9 days to Flunk Day

April 29, 2020 (Wed)[edit]

               Abatement

  With or without
  Work, money, community
  We struggle forward
  Wandering
  Wondering
  We continue in flux
  What is less now
  Will eventually rise again

8 days to Flunk Day

April 30, 2020 (Thu)[edit]

               Relief

  How can I get some?

Flunk Day 2019

7 days to Flunk Day

May 1, 2020 (Fri)[edit]

               Celebration

  If you give it some time
  If you wait patiently
  If you pay attention
  If you make it through
  If
  
  It'll all be worth it in the end, then
  I'll be there with you, to celebrate

6 days to Flunk Day

May 2, 2020 (Sat)[edit]

               The Next Day

  The weekend only exists to mark special times
  in between this eternal temporal hellscape
  
  There is no illusion of anticipation
  on a Sunday

Flunk Day 2018

5 days to Flunk Day

[8:50pm] The Knox Colorado Club dropped this (https://mcsportandmore.tuosystems.com/stores/flunkweek?fbclid=IwAR0pBs9AvEMbI8smkozAmHV5yNK49hXNy1kl81iYOaLmkLZO3JPVCcyusKg) link yesterday. Besides the general questions of Flunk Week, will it be this upcoming week? <--- Wait one flunking second... Flunk Week??? So Flunk Term and Flunk Day didn't cover enough bases? Also, props to whoever designed the TP-themed Tee. Nice.

May 4, 2020 (Mon)[edit]

              It's Not Today, But If It Were

  __.-._
  '-._"7'   May the flunk be with you.
   /'.-c
   |  /T
  _)_/LI

Flunk Day 2017

Our first day back, if emails are to be believed. Can we storm campus with flunk? Or not! Goodbye, Spring Term on campus! 4 days to Flunk Day

May 5, 2020 (Tue)[edit]

              2020 Flunk: A Six-Word Memoir

  Flunk Week confirmed. It's always tomorrow.

The first day after we get back to classes (maybe) and also a Tuesday (a likely day for a Flunk). Your guess is as good as mine.

3 day to Flunk Day

Flunk Day today. I saw a virtual truck at virtual Monmouth.

May 6, 2020 (Wed)[edit]

              Multiple Visits From St. Flunk

  'Twas the fortnight before Flunk Week, and all were aghast
  This celebration would be quite different from the past
  Though I'm not sure how we'll find the wherewithal
  To deal with a mass scale conference call
  So what's it gonna be? Small get-togethers through Zoom
  Or livestreams broadcast straight to your living room?
  How will this Flunk Week live up to the hype
  Of former Flunk Days that didn't rely on Skype?
  Please, for my sake, don't make us use WebEx
  I'm not sure Cisco can handle something so complex.
  All I can say is "May your bandwidth be high!"
  Flunk week is upon us, and the term seems to imply
  Five days off from school is as good as it gets
  As for the logistics, I implore you: Place your bets!

2 days to Flunk Day

May 7, 2020 (Thu)[edit]

              Making A Deep Fried Funnel Cake In Quarantine

  So you want to eat something different today, and you want it to be homemade,
  But you don't want to go too fancy with the ingredients because
  1. You don't have a whole bunch of stuff in stock and you try not to leave your house really ever, 
  Especially not to go to the store, and
  2. You're already feeling lazy and demotivated and, look, you just want to make a simple fun little thing, alright?
  Well, maybe you can bring back some past Flunk Days' nostalgia and make a funnel cake. Not just any funnel cake of course. 
  You want it deep fried. 
  And you want to eat it under the influence of a lot of alcohol, 
  So you can't really taste the failure if and when you screw up baking this.
  You've got some flour, two eggs, sugar, salt, 
  And some lactose free milk 'cause you've decided you don't want your stomach to hate you too much today. 
  You also own a pan, right? It's gotta have some depth to it if you wanna deep fry anything.
  I mean, ideally, you'd have a deep fryer, but who the heck owns a deep fryer?
  If you don't have a deep pan, well then you're just making regular funnel cake, and due to current life circumstances
  Being as they are, I guess I'll forgive you for your shallow pan.
  Two other ingredients you definitely own is oil and baking powder. You have baking powder right? 
  No? Alright, look, you can use baking soda, but it's not gonna be pretty. 
  If you're using the bs, you're also gonna need some acid to neutralize that shit. Get some vinegar or lemon or something.
  Now, if you really wanna be fancy, you'll also own some vanilla extract. But damn is that an expensive ingredient,
  It's almost as expensive as what you think the cost of toilet paper should be right now, 
  What with supply and demand and all that jazz.
  So I'll forgive you again for not having vanilla extract.
  
  Now let's start making the batter. Fuck the measuring equipment; 
  You're doing this the way your six times great grandmother used to bake.
  Start with a handful of flour. Really try to scoop it all in there and have it sit like a failed lumpy sandcastle in your palm. 
  Put that lump of flour in a bowl. Do this three or four more times with the flour.
  Now put some sugar in your scooped hand, but this time, don't lump it on there. Have it lay flat and level in your hand.
  Dump this palmed amount into the bowl with your flour. 
  Now pinch some salt into that bowl, and not just any baby pinches,
  I'm talking salt bae pinches where you can see the grains fly out.
  Do this about four times.
  Now do the same with baking powder, but this time about eight or nine times.
  If you don't have baking powder, then use maybe three pinches of baking soda, but remember to add some acid to the liquid stuff.
  Speaking of the liquid stuff, you own at least two bowls, right? If not, or if you REALLY want to minimize the dish-washing work,
  Then fine, you can mix the liquids with the dry stuff straight away, but don't blame me when your funnel cake tastes like ass.
  Start with the two eggs. Crack 'em into the bowl and start beating them like you've entered a fantasy world with no rules
  And you've just come face-to-face with your least favorite politician. Use a fork if you don't have a whisk.
  After the eggs get frothy, pour in your fake milk. Hold the pour for about three seconds. 
  If you poured too little, you can always correct it when you mix your batter. If you poured too much, well shit...
  Anyway, if you have vanilla extract, now's the time to put two or three drops in with the liquids.
  If you used baking soda, now's the time to add in a wee bit of lemon juice or other acid (but most preferably lemon juice).
  Combine your dry and wet bowls together. Or y'know, mix 'em up better if you only used one bowl to start with, you heathen.
  Congrats, you've made your batter. It should be almost consistent with pancake batter. 
  You do know what pancake batter looks like, right?
  It should be completely smooth, no clumps or lumps, and should run with a viscosity of maybe 2,700 cPs. Pretty simple stuff.
  
  It's time to bake. This is the part where if you don't have a deep fryer, I'd recommend putting on a full out hazmat suit
  'Cause that oil is gonna pop and it is going to burn. 
  But hey, if you're feeling adventurous, those third-degree scars will be a nice companion to the mental ones you've accrued.
  Pour a good bit of oil into your pan until it's completely covered and then add some more for depth.
  You probably shouldn't use olive oil since it'll smoke too quickly.
  Heat the oil at medium-low and put something wooden in it to check if it's hot enough. 
  If you're desperate, use any ol' backyard stick.
  The oil should bubble steadily and gently around the wood if it's at the right temp. 
  If it's too hot, it'll bubble way too much; turn the heat down.
  If you haven't guessed it yet, it's called a funnel cake 'cause you typically pour the batter through a funnel. 
  You can replace the funnel with a plastic baggie with the tip cut off to pour from.
  If you have a cup with a lip, you can also scoop the batter and pour from the lip.
  Stream the batter in pretty circular swirls in your pan. 
  Give it two to three minutes to bake until it's a nice golden brown, then
  Figure out how to get it out of the pan without hurting yourself. 
  Pro tip: don't stick your fingers in there! Extra points if you own a pair of tongs. 
  If your batter is in shallow oil, then you're gonna have to flip it.
  Lemme tell you, nothing's scarier than flipping something while exposing your skin over hot oil. Good luck!
  Once you've fried all of the batter, you're done baking. 
  Feel free to decorate your cake with even more sugar, chocolate syrup, whipped cream, etc.
  
  Congratulations, you made a deep fried funnel cake? Well... you made something. 
  Maybe try coating it in more sugar if it doesn't taste good...
  There's one more thing you've gotta do after you bake, though, and that's clean up. 
  DO NOT POUR THE EXCESS OIL DOWN THE DRAIN! You'll clog the pipes. 
  First of all, remove the oil from the heat and let it sit and cool. Enjoy your cakes or alcohol while you wait.
  If you have any sort of empty container, it's best to pour the oil into there and then dispose of it in the garbage. 
  Otherwise, you can pour it straight into a lined garbage bag as long as the oil is cool.
  Even then, try to aim for other stuff already in the garbage if you can. Also, don't just give up and pour the oil outside.
  Oil makes for pretty poor compost. Be responsible.
  Also, soak your oil-lined pan in soap, then scrub, then soak again. Soap is really good at breaking down oil.
  Oh, and one last thing, wash your hands. Please.

1 days to Flunk Day

May 8, 2020 (Fri)[edit]

              Making A Deep Fried Funnel Cake In Quarantine?

  It should look a little something like this: https://imgur.com/a/mhi6WLW

Since the world has turned upside down everything is opposite. We will know when Flunk Day is this year, and it WILL be on a friday. Friday, May 8th, is Flunk day. Tell everyone. We will have events hosted on campus (want to watch the sunset at Knox from a livestream? want to control someone walking around campus only with your commands while they livestream it? we can figure something out).

Tell everyone. Flunk day will not be taken away from us. Stay safe and social distance. but get your flunk on. <---Bud, no offense, but the rumblings among faculty/staff is that there's gonna be a "real" (virtual but legitimate) flunk day, and noah fence, it's probably not gonna be May 8th. <----- bud, no offense, but this was a pretty freakin close guess :P

May 9, 2020 (Sat)[edit]

              The End Of The Week

  And now that it's here, life is good. 
  There are things to do but now I've got some free time.
  I don't have to worry about anything today,
  So I think I'll get lost in a video game
  For maybe just one or two hours
  Consecutively.

Jonathan Powers always says Flunk Day will be May 9th, and since Jonathan Powers is always right, obviously Flunk Day will be May 9th.

May 10, 2020 (Sun)[edit]

              The Start Of The Week

  And I didn't do what I said I would.
  There are things I should have done, but it'll be fine.
  Although I really wish that it was still yesterday
  The reality is that I'm the one to blame
  For the fact that Sundays are dour
  Comparatively.

Flunk Day 2016

May 11, 2020 (Mon)[edit]

              Flunk Week ASCII

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So is this a virtual fake wake-up from the friars? Doesn't have the same oomph as being woken up at 5 AM... <-- Nah, this isn't that. Though I wonder how they'd announce it to everyone (besides a regular ol' email). Maybe they'll use the Knox Alert Test? I wonder if the Flunk "Day" Hotline has been changed for this year...

May 12, 2020 (Tue)[edit]

              Virtual Truck Spotted

                         _____________________________________________________
                        |                                                     |
               _______  |                                                     |
              / _____ | |                                                     |
             / /     || |                                                     |
    ________/ /_|    || |                                                     |
   |         |-------|| |                                                     |
  (|         |     -.|| |_______________________                              |
   |  ____   \       ||_________||____________  |             ____      ____  |
  /| / __ \   |______||     / __ \   / __ \   | |            / __ \    / __ \ |\
  \|| /  \ |_______________| /  \ |_| /  \ |__| |___________| /  \ |__| /  \|_|/
     | () |                 | () |   | () |                  | () |    | () |
      \__/                   \__/     \__/                    \__/      \__/

I think it would be very funny if Flunk Week isn't real and we are actually having classes cancelled on Flunk Day. I would applaud y'all for that.

ITS TOMORROW TRUCKS HAVE BEEN SPOTTED AT HOLIDAY INN

THE ROCK HAS CONFIRMED THAT THE TRUCKS ARE FOR FLUNK DAY HAPPY FLUNK DAYYYY BABY GUUUUUUURRLLLLLL

May 13, 2020 (Wed)[edit]

              Virtual Cheers
    _
   {_}
   |(|                   |~|
   |=|            |~|    |_|
  /   \           |_|        |~|
  |.--|                      |_|
  ||  |
  ||  |     .       ' .        ___
  |'--|   '       \~ ~ ~/     |__\_
  '-=-' \~ ~ ~/    \_ _/           
         \_ _/       Y            
           Y        _|_
          _|_
  
  且_(ﾟ◇ﾟ)ノﾞ     (^_^)/V☆V\(^_^)

May 14, 2020 (Thu)[edit]

              Virtual Regret

  %`= '_  .# ~ " '_  *o ` & " % '* +. _  * `$
  .^',*. , =' ^ - ~ . %`!= '_  * # ^',*. ,- !
  - " % '_  o `@ =, ^ ~ . %`= '_  . $`  ' o _
  =, ^ ~ . %`! =^ ~ . "  ` * ! .# % '_  * ^ - 
  .`  ' o* +. - " _(´ཀ`」 ∠)_ .`  ' o , % & ~'
  %`= '_  .# ~ " @ `= '_ # % '_  o + * `$ " `
  .^',*. , =' ^ !` '_  * o `@ =, ~ . % ' _ ! "
  - ! % '_  * `$ ^ ~ . %`"= % '_  o * , @ ` .,
  =, ^ ~ . %`"= " % '_  o ',* + ` ! ~ # ,` - *

May 15, 2020 (Fri)[edit]

              Virtual Nap

  Z
   z
    z
     (¦˒[￣]^_
         \

May 18, 2020 (Mon)[edit]

So I'm assuming it's this week, then? Not much of a surprise, huh? Kinda lackluster on the surprise bit this year, I’ve know since the 11th that it has to be this week. 

              'Twas the TRUE night before Flunk Week

  'Twas the night before Flunk Week, to no one's surprise
  To those of you who called it, come and claim your prize
  Of... what? A week with no school? I dunno, do you?
  Know that for this Spring Term, you've almost made it through.
  2020 has been wild. We're not even halfway done,
  So use these five days to relax and have some fun.

Happy Flunk Week to everyone but mostly the person writing poetry and stuff in here, I really appreciate your work! <-- Thanks! And doubly thanks also for creating this page! It's a shame I'm not a writing major; I could've used this in my portfolio. Happy Flunk Week All!

Drake bell has advised us to day drink even if we have class. ^Wow that was... surreal

May 19, 2020 (Tue)[edit]

              How it feels to be right

  😎

May 20, 2020 (Wed)[edit]

              How it feels knowing you don't get a day off

  😑

May 21, 2020 (Thu)[edit]

              Flunk Week 2020 Scavenger Hunt Items

  1. 🗅🔥🦊🔥🗅
  2. 📘
  3. 🧠
  4. ☕
  5. 📃
  6. 📰
  7. 🎹
  8. 🦊
  9. ⬜˜😬
  10. ⛎8️⃣
  11. 🚽🗞️🗑️
  12. 🐱
  13. 🚴‍♀️
  14. ☆
  15. 🐻
  16. 📅
  17. 🐚
  18. 📖
  19. 🏳️‍🌈
  20. 🍌

May 22, 2020 (Fri)[edit]

              Crossroads

  Today we stand at a crossroad
  Looking at the end of a week-long rendition
  Of online performances contrary to tradition
  We stand in the middle of an indoor epoch
  Staring down the last line of the epode
  Wondering where to go from here
  
  It is not too late to step on the brakes
  Take a left turn at the next lane
  While the sign says to go right ahead
  This is our path to choose
  
  Who knows what the future bodes
  The outcome is not predisposed
  When the beginning is as chaotic
  It gets easier to temper the fear
  When we start with nothing to lose
  
  With feet unsteady, we face the teeth
  Of time baring down on us
  And we, what do we do?
  
  I, I face one way
  You, you face another
  And we step through the crossroads

May 25, 2020 (Mon)[edit]

              Memorial Day : Year 2020

   ___
  (_ _)
   | |
   | |
   | |
   | |
   | |
   | |
   | |
   | |
   | |
   | |
   | |--- * * * * * * * * * * OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO|
   | |   \ * * * * * * * * *  :::::::::::::::::::::::::|
   | |    * * * * * * * * * * OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO|
   | |     * * * * * * * * *  :::::::::::::::::::::::::|
   | |    * * * * * * * * * * OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO|
   | |     * * * * * * * * *  :::::::::::::::::::::::::|
   | |    * * * * * * * * * * OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO|
   | |    :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::|
   | |    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO|
   | |    :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::|
   | |    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO|
   | |   /:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::|
   | |  / OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO|
   | |-
   | |
   | |
   | |
   | |
   | |
   | |
   | |
   |_|

May 26, 2020 (Tue)[edit]

              Last Day Of Classes Countdown: 3 days

  Flunk Week may be over, but Flunk Term has always been with us.
  Breathe in. Breathe out. I implore you to hold steady until the end.

May 27, 2020 (Wed)[edit]

              Last Day Of Classes Countdown: 2 days

  Congratulations on all that you've managed to accomplish
  And for all the things you will accomplish later on.

May 28, 2020 (Thu)[edit]

              Last Day Of Classes Countdown: 1 day

  You made it! For most of you now, there's only one hurdle left,
  So face forward, believe in yourself, and spring to the end!

June 7, 2020 (Sun)[edit]

Flunk instead of Commencement?? <-- In the Gizmogram's own words "a virtual celebration is being planned for June 7." And what better way is there to celebrate the Spring Term? 

              An Open Letter to the Class of 2020

  Hey, everyone. Congrats! You made it. Know that I and many others are very proud of you, and we wish you happiness and safety wherever you may go. That's about all that I wanted to say. I know, it's a bit anticlimactic isn't it? Of course, just because something isn't exciting doesn't mean it's not worth celebrating and reflecting upon. 
  
  I'm not Maria Hinojosa, and this is not a commencement speech. Rather, this is just some friendly communication from me to you, to let you know that you are acknowledged, your journey is appreciated, and you are not alone. Plus, the fun thing about a letter versus a speech is that letters feel more intimate, and more encouraging of a reply. (Side note: did you know each page on the WikiFire has a discussion tab?) On the internet, there are so many platforms for discourse, so many ways you can learn and share in various ideas with people you might have never met otherwise. Off the internet, there exist public forums and other ways to make your voice heard. 
  
  Instead of the multiple speeches that you would have received today, have a discussion. Have multiple discussions. Stay connected with your friends and with your community. 
  
  I'd wager that most folks don't remember much about their graduation after a few years, at least not what was said or the details of what happened on that day. Although 2020 is a very memorable year that will no doubt go down in history, memory is still a fickle thing. And so, I encourage you to think about writing your own letter to yourself. Recount what you're doing today, how you feel, what you're thinking about, and what you want to tell your future self. 
  
  What I want to tell both present and future you is always keep your momentum going. Find time for your hobbies and avenues for laughter. Interact with people, make new acquaintances, civilly challenge their view of the world as well as your own. Never stop asking questions and never stop learning. And, of course, stay hydrated.
  
  Here are some of my favorite letter closings that I've been using these past few months:
  
  Well wishes,
  Take care,
  Cheers from afar,
  Quarantinely,
  
  96.241.228.56 18:12, 6 June 2020 (PDT)

Early August (???)[edit]

Flunk instead of Commencement...2? (Pritzker permitting, of course) 

              An Open Letter to Tom Fucoloro

  Hi Tfooq,
  
  You don't know me and I only know of you, but I just wanted to say (well, type), "Thank you." I, and no doubt many others, probably felt the vague pressure to somehow become the best versions of ourselves simply because pseudo-quarantine has given us more "free time." It was very easy to become disappointed with myself before falling asleep at night, realizing that I spent most of the day being as unproductive as always, laying in bed, watching Youtube videos, and playing video games. I guess it's questionable whether editing the WikiFire can be considered productive, but it did give me a goal and I had fun doing it. Besides, this WikiFire has given me a lot of joy over the years beyond just this page, so I want to thank you for being the progenitor of it all. 
  
  Anyway, good luck with your career, stay safe and healthy, and keep on keeping on!
  
  All the best,
  A fellow alum
  
  (Post-script: Thanks also to Sarahwall. Flunk Term is a brilliant name!)
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