Flunk Term 2020
Revision as of 17:46, 12 May 2020 by 96.241.228.56 (talk)
The most cursed term of them all, Flunk Term 2020.
The hype, the hope, and the hurt, the facts and the phallices; will you be packing up your 6 foot bong? How much PBR do you need to stock up on? Or Corona? Have you spotted Teresa Amott without her human skin, wandering campus alone? Tell us about the unicorn that galloped through the quad while no one was there but you. Pick your e-girl outfit, fill your bottles with rum, grab a shovel and dig dig d i g
Join us. Hear the friars across the world. Join us with (virtual) pots and pans and heart and (virtual) hype.
Join us.
(don't forget to hydrate.)
Contents
- 1 Join in the fun?
- 2 April 1, 2020 (Wed)
- 3 April 2, 2020 (Thu)
- 4 April 3, 2020 (Fri)
- 5 April 6, 2020 (Mon)
- 6 April 7, 2020 (Tue)
- 7 April 8, 2020 (Wed)
- 8 April 9, 2020 (Thu)
- 9 April 10, 2020 (Fri)
- 10 April 13, 2020 (Mon)
- 11 April 14, 2020 (Tue)
- 12 April 15, 2020 (Wed)
- 13 April 16, 2020 (Thu)
- 14 April 17, 2020 (Fri)
- 15 April 20, 2020 (Mon)
- 16 April 21, 2020 (Tue)
- 17 April 22, 2020 (Wed)
- 18 April 23, 2020 (Thu)
- 19 April 24, 2020 (Fri)
- 20 April 27, 2020 (Mon)
- 21 April 28, 2020 (Tue)
- 22 April 29, 2020 (Wed)
- 23 April 30, 2020 (Thu)
- 24 May 1, 2020 (Fri)
- 25 May 2, 2020 (Sat)
- 26 May 4, 2020 (Mon)
- 27 May 5, 2020 (Tue)
- 28 May 6, 2020 (Wed)
- 29 May 7, 2020 (Thu)
- 30 May 8, 2020 (Fri)
- 31 May 9, 2020 (Sat)
- 32 May 10, 2020 (Sun)
- 33 May 11, 2020 (Mon)
- 34 May 12, 2020 (Tue)
- 35 May 13, 2020 (Wed)
- 36 May 14, 2020 (Thu)
- 37 May 15, 2020 (Fri)
- 38 May 18, 2020 (Mon)
- 39 May 19, 2020 (Tue)
- 40 May 20, 2020 (Wed)
- 41 May 21, 2020 (Thu)
- 42 May 22, 2020 (Fri)
- 43 May 25, 2020 (Mon)
- 44 May 26, 2020 (Tue)
- 45 May 27, 2020 (Wed)
- 46 May 28, 2020 (Thu)
- 47 June 7, 2020 (Sun)
- 48 Early August (???)
Join in the fun?
Visit the How to edit the wikifire page for a quick rundown of the steps for how to edit this (and any other) page!
the more contributors we have, the more fun it gets! with the online term, we really need this, guys.
April 1, 2020 (Wed)
First day of Flunk Term. Maybe it's just an April Fools Joke?
A Visit from St. Flunk
'Twas the night before Flunk Term, when all through the lawn Not a creature was stirring, not at dusk nor at dawn; The stock market was crashing. The world was unsure How long this will last. How long must we endure? The students were nestled all snug in their beds, While visions of St. Flunk danced in their heads; And Blaze in their jersey, and Lincoln with his hat, Stood 6 feet apart and had a little chat. About squirrels, mud pits, all the memories they had Of the past and the present, both the good and the bad. They talked of SMC rats and of long nights at CFA, Of history, debates, and the Old Main stairway. And, oh, how it felt to be in college and be free To act in Playground and dance in Terpsichore. But nothing could compare to the joy of Spring term To that one special day only a few could confirm. That day better known for going wild and getting drunk Waking up at 6 am to the call of St. Flunk. With their merry band of friars and foxes in tow Their names oft forgotten, except one we all know: "We have our new mascot, their name is not Pride, Nor is it Ember, that choice was cast aside. On Blaze, dash forward, and entertain this court! Get the crowd to cheer for our team and for this sport!" And Lincoln, too, has an important sport to acclaim, The one on Post lawn, the Flunk Day softball game. And though for this year, that sport is not allowed Because of the fact that it draws in quite a crowd We can still connect while staying safe inside, As long as we permit St. Flunk to be our guide. We can still enjoy our stash of liquor and booze. It's okay to take some time to scream and let loose. What once was a day has been extended a term long Where you won't be in trouble if you're caught with a bong. Don't get me wrong, you should still focus on your class, The irony in Flunk Term is to still try to pass. And yes, Seniors, it's true that you've been pretty screwed And Freshman, it makes sense, if you're feeling confused. But there's a lot we can learn from COVID-19, Besides a reminder of the tenants of hygiene. It's taught us, though apart, we're all in this together, And though it's cliche, this is a storm we will weather. The squirrels will still cross the street without fear. We'll gather again to burn the prairie next year. Seniors, you may have thought this was your last season, But homecoming exists for this very reason. Hail to Alma Mater, after all this has passed, Come back again. Trust me, these cornfields will last, And the crows will defy the raven's nevermore Since 1837, they will cry "Evermore." Except maybe for pumphandle, that tradition can go Or we could all simply learn to greet with an elbow. Nevertheless just know this pandemic will end Keep in touch with your loved ones and be a good friend. St. Flunk's parting words while in quarantine as you wait: "Happy Flunk Term to all, and don't forget to hydrate!"
April 2, 2020 (Thu)
I Dreamed A Dream - Spring Remix
There was a time not long ago When we could go outside And sunbathe together There was a time when the radio Would give some news beyond Waiting, feeling tethered There was a time Then it all went wrong I dreamed a dream of springs back then When grades weren't high, but I was living I dreamed of coming back again I dreamed that loans would be forgiving Then I was young and unafraid To try courses and drop them later There were no book fees to be paid If they were loaned, no feeling was greater But the virus came overseas With not much done to prevent it As it took your breath away As it turned your dream to shame It might just take our summer, too As hospitals are getting desperate To not treat this like some common flu Or we'd only have ourselves to blame And still I dream that we'll all see The good change that can come from this But there are dreams that cannot be When good ideas are being dismissed I had a dream spring term would be So different from what we're all living So different now from what it seemed Will COVID-19 kill the dream I dreamed?
April 3, 2020 (Fri)
Flunk Term Acrositc - Abv.
Fun- Loving Until Now Knowing This Epidemic Really Migrated
April 6, 2020 (Mon)
Flunk Day Acrostic - Extended
Friendships are made and broken at the starting Line of the Rat Race Under the waterfall of the Slip 'n Slide Next to the fried funnel cake vendor selling to drunks singing Karaoke in front of Seymour Union Do you remember wiping out? Twisting your Ankle after the third time on the Meltdown? That's not happening this Year
25 days to Flunk Day
April 7, 2020 (Tue)
FY 2020 Q1
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24 days to Flunk Day
April 8, 2020 (Wed)
Excerpt From The Students For Flunk Day Truth
ο If you value your soul, STAY IN ON
FLUNK DAY!
23 days to Flunk Day
April 9, 2020 (Thu)
An Indoor Limerick
Sing the song of quarantine The likes of which we've never seen It stopped our day of play Forced us all to stay away And now we all learn through a screen.
22 days to Flunk Day
April 10, 2020 (Fri)
Transformation
Happens between - each
blink -
It's always an - -
time to
be alive
21 days to Flunk Day
April 13, 2020 (Mon)
You can't take tradition away from us
You can't take tradition away from us Like history books, we'll choose what can stay You can't make a change without any fuss Since the future is so precarious Always, my child, you must follow my way You can't take tradition away from us Straying from the path is too dangerous For in the unknown you are easy prey You can't make a change without any fuss Creating something new is traitorous To our ancestors and our glory days You can't take tradition away from us Legacy sticks around for good purpose And fights endlessly against the decay You can't make a change without any fuss I will live on through means vicarious Carry me when I am lost to the gray You can't take tradition away from us You can't make a change without any fuss
20 days to Flunk Day
April 14, 2020 (Tue)
Boxed In
In a box, I'm a slave to the structure — Trapped, unable to measure my wingspan. I must conform to the shape of the box. In a box, there are lines and vertices That strictly define my front, back, left, right. But what if I sat against a corner? In a box, I attempt to change my shape By trying to touch all six sides at once. I start to wonder what else I can do. In a box, I start to think this is odd. How am I so sure that I am even In a box?
19 days to Flunk Day
April 15, 2020 (Wed)
When people say, "pics or it didn't happen," what they really mean is...
[citation needed]
18 days to Flunk Day
April 16, 2020 (Thu)
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17 days to Flunk Day
April 17, 2020 (Fri)
On Mobile
What new fresh
h e l
l is
this,
t h a t
has caused
my reality to s h i
f
t
?
And yet, somehow,
sometimes,
i t
makes
things easier
to see the world
and it's people
from a distance further
than
6
feet
16 days to Flunk Day
April 20, 2020 (Mon)
Blaze It
A day that's a cause for concern That we can all readily confirm It's not Flunk Day, but you know We're all stressed right now, so Go ahead and celebrate Flunk Term.
15 days to Flunk Day
April 21, 2020 (Tue)
Coming Out
It only takes four tildes
14 days to Flunk Day
April 22, 2020 (Wed)
Flunk Term Theme Suggestions Pt. 1
Cyberflunk 2020! ◘-◘
13 days to Flunk Day
April 23, 2020 (Thu)
Flunk Term Theme Suggestions Pt. 2
Guardians of the Flunk 😷
12 days to Flunk Day
Senate GA notes finally reveal: Virtual Flunk Day will be happening, confirmed! <-- Double-confirmed! The news of Virtual Flunk is on the Gizmogram.
April 24, 2020 (Fri)
Flunk Term Theme Suggestions Pt. 3
Flunktagion 🦠
11 days to Flunk Day
April 27, 2020 (Mon)
Starvation
Laying in bed, too unmotivated to cook Lining up at a food bank, two miles long Looking at a drive-thru, wondering if it's worth it Life for a life for a life, we carry on
[2:30 PM] A direct quote from the Knox College Gizmogram: "Did You Know... Even though they're not on campus right now, students are working to keep the Flunk Day tradition alive! This year's Union Board is planning remote Flunk Day events that will connect and uplift current Knox students. As you can imagine, this is challenging for them on many personal and logistical levels. If you would like to support or collaborate with them, let us know!
Contact Becky Canfield"
10 days to Flunk Day
April 28, 2020 (Tue)
Trepidation
On the precipice of finding motivation
A heart that matches
Only to find another excuse, justified
My scattered thoughts
Or not, the guilt remains
And drumming fingertips
9 days to Flunk Day
April 29, 2020 (Wed)
Abatement
With or without Work, money, community We struggle forward Wandering Wondering We continue in flux What is less now Will eventually rise again
8 days to Flunk Day
April 30, 2020 (Thu)
Relief
How can I get some?
7 days to Flunk Day
May 1, 2020 (Fri)
Celebration
If you give it some time If you wait patiently If you pay attention If you make it through If It'll all be worth it in the end, then I'll be there with you, to celebrate
6 days to Flunk Day
May 2, 2020 (Sat)
The Next Day
The weekend only exists to mark special times in between this eternal temporal hellscape There is no illusion of anticipation on a Sunday
5 days to Flunk Day
[8:50pm] The Knox Colorado Club dropped this (https://mcsportandmore.tuosystems.com/stores/flunkweek?fbclid=IwAR0pBs9AvEMbI8smkozAmHV5yNK49hXNy1kl81iYOaLmkLZO3JPVCcyusKg) link yesterday. Besides the general questions of Flunk Week, will it be this upcoming week? <--- Wait one flunking second... Flunk Week??? So Flunk Term and Flunk Day didn't cover enough bases? Also, props to whoever designed the TP-themed Tee. Nice.
May 4, 2020 (Mon)
It's Not Today, But If It Were
__.-._ '-._"7' May the flunk be with you. /'.-c | /T _)_/LI
Our first day back, if emails are to be believed. Can we storm campus with flunk? Or not! Goodbye, Spring Term on campus! 4 days to Flunk Day
May 5, 2020 (Tue)
2020 Flunk: A Six-Word Memoir
Flunk Week confirmed. It's always tomorrow.
The first day after we get back to classes (maybe) and also a Tuesday (a likely day for a Flunk). Your guess is as good as mine.
3 day to Flunk Day
Flunk Day today. I saw a virtual truck at virtual Monmouth.
May 6, 2020 (Wed)
Multiple Visits From St. Flunk
'Twas the fortnight before Flunk Week, and all were aghast This celebration would be quite different from the past Though I'm not sure how we'll find the wherewithal To deal with a mass scale conference call So what's it gonna be? Small get-togethers through Zoom Or livestreams broadcast straight to your living room? How will this Flunk Week live up to the hype Of former Flunk Days that didn't rely on Skype? Please, for my sake, don't make us use WebEx I'm not sure Cisco can handle something so complex. All I can say is "May your bandwidth be high!" Flunk week is upon us, and the term seems to imply Five days off from school is as good as it gets As for the logistics, I implore you: Place your bets!
2 days to Flunk Day
May 7, 2020 (Thu)
Making A Deep Fried Funnel Cake In Quarantine
So you want to eat something different today, and you want it to be homemade, But you don't want to go too fancy with the ingredients because 1. You don't have a whole bunch of stuff in stock and you try not to leave your house really ever, Especially not to go to the store, and 2. You're already feeling lazy and demotivated and, look, you just want to make a simple fun little thing, alright? Well, maybe you can bring back some past Flunk Days' nostalgia and make a funnel cake. Not just any funnel cake of course. You want it deep fried. And you want to eat it under the influence of a lot of alcohol, So you can't really taste the failure if and when you screw up baking this. You've got some flour, two eggs, sugar, salt, And some lactose free milk 'cause you've decided you don't want your stomach to hate you too much today. You also own a pan, right? It's gotta have some depth to it if you wanna deep fry anything. I mean, ideally, you'd have a deep fryer, but who the heck owns a deep fryer? If you don't have a deep pan, well then you're just making regular funnel cake, and due to current life circumstances Being as they are, I guess I'll forgive you for your shallow pan. Two other ingredients you definitely own is oil and baking powder. You have baking powder right? No? Alright, look, you can use baking soda, but it's not gonna be pretty. If you're using the bs, you're also gonna need some acid to neutralize that shit. Get some vinegar or lemon or something. Now, if you really wanna be fancy, you'll also own some vanilla extract. But damn is that an expensive ingredient, It's almost as expensive as what you think the cost of toilet paper should be right now, What with supply and demand and all that jazz. So I'll forgive you again for not having vanilla extract. Now let's start making the batter. Fuck the measuring equipment; You're doing this the way your six times great grandmother used to bake. Start with a handful of flour. Really try to scoop it all in there and have it sit like a failed lumpy sandcastle in your palm. Put that lump of flour in a bowl. Do this three or four more times with the flour. Now put some sugar in your scooped hand, but this time, don't lump it on there. Have it lay flat and level in your hand. Dump this palmed amount into the bowl with your flour. Now pinch some salt into that bowl, and not just any baby pinches, I'm talking salt bae pinches where you can see the grains fly out. Do this about four times. Now do the same with baking powder, but this time about eight or nine times. If you don't have baking powder, then use maybe three pinches of baking soda, but remember to add some acid to the liquid stuff. Speaking of the liquid stuff, you own at least two bowls, right? If not, or if you REALLY want to minimize the dish-washing work, Then fine, you can mix the liquids with the dry stuff straight away, but don't blame me when your funnel cake tastes like ass. Start with the two eggs. Crack 'em into the bowl and start beating them like you've entered a fantasy world with no rules And you've just come face-to-face with your least favorite politician. Use a fork if you don't have a whisk. After the eggs get frothy, pour in your fake milk. Hold the pour for about three seconds. If you poured too little, you can always correct it when you mix your batter. If you poured too much, well shit... Anyway, if you have vanilla extract, now's the time to put two or three drops in with the liquids. If you used baking soda, now's the time to add in a wee bit of lemon juice or other acid (but most preferably lemon juice). Combine your dry and wet bowls together. Or y'know, mix 'em up better if you only used one bowl to start with, you heathen. Congrats, you've made your batter. It should be almost consistent with pancake batter. You do know what pancake batter looks like, right? It should be completely smooth, no clumps or lumps, and should run with a viscosity of maybe 2,700 cPs. Pretty simple stuff. It's time to bake. This is the part where if you don't have a deep fryer, I'd recommend putting on a full out hazmat suit 'Cause that oil is gonna pop and it is going to burn. But hey, if you're feeling adventurous, those third-degree scars will be a nice companion to the mental ones you've accrued. Pour a good bit of oil into your pan until it's completely covered and then add some more for depth. You probably shouldn't use olive oil since it'll smoke too quickly. Heat the oil at medium-low and put something wooden in it to check if it's hot enough. If you're desperate, use any ol' backyard stick. The oil should bubble steadily and gently around the wood if it's at the right temp. If it's too hot, it'll bubble way too much; turn the heat down. If you haven't guessed it yet, it's called a funnel cake 'cause you typically pour the batter through a funnel. You can replace the funnel with a plastic baggie with the tip cut off to pour from. If you have a cup with a lip, you can also scoop the batter and pour from the lip. Stream the batter in pretty circular swirls in your pan. Give it two to three minutes to bake until it's a nice golden brown, then Figure out how to get it out of the pan without hurting yourself. Pro tip: don't stick your fingers in there! Extra points if you own a pair of tongs. If your batter is in shallow oil, then you're gonna have to flip it. Lemme tell you, nothing's scarier than flipping something while exposing your skin over hot oil. Good luck! Once you've fried all of the batter, you're done baking. Feel free to decorate your cake with even more sugar, chocolate syrup, whipped cream, etc. Congratulations, you made a deep fried funnel cake? Well... you made something. Maybe try coating it in more sugar if it doesn't taste good... There's one more thing you've gotta do after you bake, though, and that's clean up. DO NOT POUR THE EXCESS OIL DOWN THE DRAIN! You'll clog the pipes. First of all, remove the oil from the heat and let it sit and cool. Enjoy your cakes or alcohol while you wait. If you have any sort of empty container, it's best to pour the oil into there and then dispose of it in the garbage. Otherwise, you can pour it straight into a lined garbage bag as long as the oil is cool. Even then, try to aim for other stuff already in the garbage if you can. Also, don't just give up and pour the oil outside. Oil makes for pretty poor compost. Be responsible. Also, soak your oil-lined pan in soap, then scrub, then soak again. Soap is really good at breaking down oil. Oh, and one last thing, wash your hands. Please.
1 days to Flunk Day
May 8, 2020 (Fri)
Making A Deep Fried Funnel Cake In Quarantine?
It should look a little something like this: https://imgur.com/a/mhi6WLW
Since the world has turned upside down everything is opposite. We will know when Flunk Day is this year, and it WILL be on a friday. Friday, May 8th, is Flunk day. Tell everyone. We will have events hosted on campus (want to watch the sunset at Knox from a livestream? want to control someone walking around campus only with your commands while they livestream it? we can figure something out).
Tell everyone. Flunk day will not be taken away from us. Stay safe and social distance. but get your flunk on. <---Bud, no offense, but the rumblings among faculty/staff is that there's gonna be a "real" (virtual but legitimate) flunk day, and noah fence, it's probably not gonna be May 8th. <----- bud, no offense, but this was a pretty freakin close guess :P
May 9, 2020 (Sat)
The End Of The Week
And now that it's here, life is good. There are things to do but now I've got some free time. I don't have to worry about anything today That I have the time to put off until tomorrow, So I think I'll get lost in a video game For maybe just one or two hours Consecutively.
Jonathan Powers always says Flunk Day will be May 9th, and since Jonathan Powers is always right, obviously Flunk Day will be May 9th.
May 10, 2020 (Sun)
The Start Of The Week
And I didn't do what I said I would. There are things I should have done, but it'll be fine. Although I really wish that it was still yesterday The reality is that I'm the one to blame For the fact that Sundays are dour Comparatively.
May 11, 2020 (Mon)
Flunk Week ASCII
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So is this a virtual fake wake-up from the friars? Doesn't have the same oomph as being woken up at 5 AM... <-- Nah, this isn't that. I don't know how they'll announce it to everyone (besides a regular ol' email). Maybe they'll use the Knox Alert Test? I wonder if the Flunk "Day" Hotline has been changed for this year...
May 12, 2020 (Tue)
Virtual Truck Spotted
_____________________________________________________
| |
_______ | |
/ _____ | | |
/ / || | |
________/ /_| || | |
| |-------|| | |
(| | -.|| |_______________________ |
| ____ \ ||_________||____________ | ____ ____ |
/| / __ \ |______|| / __ \ / __ \ | | / __ \ / __ \ |\
\|| / \ |_______________| / \ |_| / \ |__| |___________| / \ |__| / \|_|/
| () | | () | | () | | () | | () |
\__/ \__/ \__/ \__/ \__/
I think it would be very funny if Flunk Week isn't real and we are actually having classes cancelled on Flunk Day. I would applaud y'all for that.
ITS TOMORROW TRUCKS HAVE BEEN SPOTTED AT HOLIDAY INN
THE ROCK HAS CONFIRMED THAT THE TRUCKS ARE FOR FLUNK DAY HAPPY FLUNK DAYYYY BABY GUUUUUUURRLLLLLL
May 13, 2020 (Wed)
Virtual Cheers
_
{_}
|(| |~|
|=| |~| |_|
/ \ |_| |~|
|.--| |_|
|| |
|| | . ' . ___
|'--| ' \~ ~ ~/ |__\_
'-=-' \~ ~ ~/ \_ _/
\_ _/ Y
Y _|_
_|_
且_(ﾟ◇ﾟ)ノﾞ (^_^)/V☆V\(^_^)
May 14, 2020 (Thu)
May 15, 2020 (Fri)
May 18, 2020 (Mon)
May 19, 2020 (Tue)
May 20, 2020 (Wed)
May 21, 2020 (Thu)
May 22, 2020 (Fri)
May 25, 2020 (Mon)
May 26, 2020 (Tue)
May 27, 2020 (Wed)
May 28, 2020 (Thu)
June 7, 2020 (Sun)
Flunk instead of Commencement?? <-- In the Gizmogram's own words "a virtual celebration is being planned for June 7." And what better way is there to celebrate the Spring Term?
Early August (???)
Flunk instead of Commencement...2? (Pritzker permitting, of course)
