Naked House

Naked House stood solemnly at 270 W. Tompkins, nestled between the Jazz House and the apartment complex at 284 W. Tompkins, posing little threat to the existing way of life, much like an adorable and fuzzy circus bear lying in a hammock.

The Life and Times of Naked House

Naked House was not always known as Naked House, of course; as with all matters of this nature, Naked House came into its own like a confused high schooler drifting from clique to clique in hopes of belonging. According to Craig Southern, the building was once known as Harambee House and housed people interested in black and African culture, though he admits it "hasn't been Harambee House for a few years now." During Homecoming 2007, several drunken alumni stumbled into Naked House and informed the residents that during the '01-'02 school year, it had been known as "the Fun Hut."

As of the '06-'07 school year, the house at 270 W. Tompkins was known as Habitat House, as in Habitat for Humanity. This period in the house's history was turbulent, and during the month of May 2007, the house was broken into.

For the duration of the '07-'08 school year, Naked House was officially named and instituted by its residents, a truly charming and amiable group of students who will surely be loved by the Knox populace for years to come.

Naked House Residents

• Sara Belger
• Tasha Coryell
• Daniel Dyrda
• Tony Hahn
• Andrea Johnston
• Andrea's roommate (who for certain reasons did not want her name on this page)
• Laura Miller
• Allison Smith
• Jennie Zavacos

Naked House Philosophy

As might be expected, the title of "Naked House" has stirred a small bit of controversy. What do they mean by "naked?" Do the residents share a naturalist philosphy and simply stroll about their home in the buff? Are they simply avid drinkers of Naked Juice? Or do they, as the photo for their Facebook group suggests, have an affinity for the strange and unsettling naked mole rat? Unfortunately for the college community, answers are sparse in coming. The Facebook group confirms that, yes, there will be nudity in the house, but if it goes beyond such necessary nakedness as showering and changing clothes, no one is quite sure. One resident of Naked House speculates that, unless concrete information is not spread to the community at large soon, "we can expect to see a rise in voyeuristic crimes."

Eyes Toward the Future

Naked House's current theme will cease to exist at the end of the '07-'08 school year. The title and philosophy to replace "Naked" will be "Steak House". The new theme will fulfill its claims, where as before Naked House did virtually nothing by way of benefit to campus.

However, having not benefited campus was not in the contractual agreement entered into by the current residents of Naked House. Therefore, how they implemented their nudity was strictly an internal issue. Hopefully with the return of theme housing the greatness that is Naked House will not be forgotten.

Yeah, seriously Steak House, we were not a theme house.

The Bar

A bar of once mysterious origins has existed in the Naked House living room for quite some time. It was revealed by the previously mentioned alumni that they had been the ones responsible for the building of the bar, which cost a thousand dollars to construct. According to the alumni, the bar went through sixty-nine kegs during their tenure in the house. The bar was a central feature of parties throughout the year, one of which resulted in the living room floor dropping approximately one foot; the beams supporting the floor being broken under the sheer weight of the party-goers. Also, some current residents have hidden their shameful nudity behind the bar on at least one occasion.

On Feb. 19, 2008, the residents of Naked House were informed that the bar would be removed prior to Spring Term. One of the drunken alumni decided that, rather than replicating the bar that he idolized so much, he wanted the original. Go figure.

The removal of the bar was delayed due to unknown factors in the drunken alum's family life. However, it was indeed removed on the morning of March 29th, and there was much rejoicing.

Rumor has it that another bar will be built in its stead.

However, that rumor is false. Very false.

More Information

Would you like to know more about the fascinating characters who inhabited this so-called Naked House? Join the Facebook group!